Originally published April 1, 2018
In a surprise Easter press release, the White House today announced that former Senator and presidential candidate, Rick Santorum, will join the administration to serve as a special adviser to President Trump. Sources are saying that Trump, adhering to his recent pattern of recruiting staffers, cabinet members, and lawyers based on how much he likes their television performances, contacted the former Pennsylvania legislator immediately after Santorum appeared on CNN last Sunday.
Santorum, currently a CNN political commentator, became a story himself when he reacted to the student-led March for Our Lives by suggesting that kids should try to learn how to respond to a mass shooter as individuals rather than demanding large-scale change from lawmakers.
“How about kids, instead of looking to someone else to solve their problem, do something about maybe taking CPR classes?” he said, challenging the 14 to 18 year-old students who had survived the Marjory Stoneman Douglas shooting. He continued: “They took action to ask someone to pass a law. They didn’t take action to say, ‘How do I as an individual deal with this problem? How am I gonna do something about stopping bullying in my community? What am I gonna do to actually help respond to a shooter?’ ”
Apparently recognizing the potential of an approach no one has previously proposed, public reaction was swift. For example, many were quick to see how the public would benefit from mandating CPR courses as a graduation requirement. Asked if the nation’s public schools were up to such a task, Education Secretary Betsy DeVos laughed, “Of course not! But, for something so vital to our children’s safety, we will call on private and charter schools in every state!”
Predictably, a vocal minority of physicians and other health professionals objected, citing silly reasons based on medical science. Heather Sher, a Florida-based radiologist who examined the gunshot wounds of at least one Parkland, Fla., shooting victim on the day of the shooting, called Santorum’s comments “gobsmackingly uninformed.”
Which clearly must have impressed and appealed to the President, who has demonstrated new energy of late by embracing his own uninformedness and penchant for “trusting his gut.”
Curious about what type of influence he might have in the administration, I spoke this morning to Darlene Stewart, spokesperson for Mr. Santorum. I asked if the two men had discussed exactly what his role might be. The answer was yes and I was surprised to find that there are already several innovations under consideration.
“The President was so impressed with Rick’s bold assertion that those kids need to grow up and take some responsibility for their lives, they have been brainstorming how to apply that notion to various government agencies and functions.”
Based on the unusual effectiveness of Administrator Scott Pruitt, the EPA may be one of the first places Santorum focuses. According to Stewart, we can expect a new direction in the agency’s regulation of clean air and water. “Rick believes the nanny state should stop listening to all the eco-whining about pollution. Instead of looking to someone else to solve their problems, asking for unreasonable things like laws and such, why don’t people take action themselves? If someone finds toxic chemicals in their water, get your townspeople together and clean it up! Buy a water filter, for god’s sake! Got a problem with breathing the air in your big, crime-infested sanctuary city? Get a trailer and move! Move to the country, where the air is good and so are the people. Lots of Trump signs out there.” She chuckled and added, “That last part was the President’s idea.”
I didn’t get a chance to hear any other great ideas, as Stewart had to take a call from Sarah Huckabee Sanders. But, I’m sure we’ll hear about them soon.
Happy Easter!